So This Is Me [2012]

Tis sad, I Like Blogger, I just dont have any followers, and its fun to create posts here.
I havn't posted anything in TWO years...Two years...thats a long time,eh?

 ALOT has happened. And tis sad, cause I started using this blog as an outlet, as a sort of diary.
BUT, Im glad to say,Im in a MUCH better place now,in 2012,

 than where I was in 2010, the last time i posted here.

 Which is good news,right? Right.
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So,yes. A SHIT load has happened in my life.
Things have changed, people have entered my life and left again.
This year, I have changed my hair the most times ever, 

and I did it all myself with my razor. 

When I chopped off my hair, it was my way of...'cutting', i guess? Sounds silly... but thats what I did. I was a...temporary cutter, in 2010/11. Thankfully,I never became a serious cutter, I never used it as MY way of coping with myself and my issues. If You are a cutter, DONT LET IT GET TO A POINT WHERE IT IS YOUR ONLY WAY OUT. Please dont. Get help, talk, do something that takes your mind off depression. Please mind yourself.
But, on the other hand, because I wasn't really a cutter, (but I did self-harm for a while) I destroyed myself,on the inside those two years. Maybe if I hurt myself on the outside, I wouldn't of hurt so much on the inside then. But,I wont ever know i guess.

 Mmh... What else happened during the last 2 years?
I developed my voice, which i am VERY thankful for. Thanks to my vocal teacher, Rachel, who has been training me for the past 2 and a half years now. Im VERY glad, and very blessed, and very thankful. I am more on my way to being a good singer now. Tjis year, 2012, I have landed a lead role in my school show. We did Les Mis, and I played fantine. Twas great it was.

I Dreamed a dream in time gone by...
When Hope was High, and Life worth living.

So, that was a brilliant thing because it was the first time the people in my school (bar maybe very few friends) who realized that I can sing, because I never flaunted it or showed off. I try to be humble.

This year, I began to speak to one of my old best friends. When we were 'best friends' she was the closest friend to me, I told her EVERYTHING and we loved each other, it was lovely. She had a fight with me in 2010,If i remember clearly, that added to one of the things that made that year the worst one of my life,so far.The last thing she said to me was that I was ' a selfish bitch' and that 'she is sick of my shit'.
Though,with me... I wasn't full of shit. I only get so attatched,it becomes almost obsessive.
And I try to everything for them, and try so hard to ensure that they love me.
Which...usually leads to them leaving me because im a freak.I dont like my White Knight Syndrome =____= stupid white knight syndrome...

But yeah, we started talking again this year.

That meant alot to me, cause she doesn't despise me then.
AND, I would rather be on good terms with everybody.

Also In the last 2 years, in October 2011, I met one of my closest friends Now.
Her name is Ciara. And we clocked straight away, when we met. She was this little awkward,shy, chatter box-because-she-is-nervous, anxious little human when we met! And I looked like a boy, when she had this long,curly black hair. So, now, we celebrated our One-year anniversary (yes, we are that silly) in October.
So,that was a major thing in my life. Though, now we're very different people, and we're 100% comfortable with each other now. So..yesh.

<- This is Us. Biba & Mello

This year, I moved house THREE TIMES IN ONE YEAR.
Yes. It was insane. And each house got better and better until our last move, less than a month ago now.
And its December now. Christmas is next Tuesday. Sigh. And there's  six of us,squished into a 3-bedroom house, which is TEENY tiny for us, as spoiled as that sounds. Sigh. I Miss my attic in our old,bigger house, but we got kicked out, for the second time. Sigh.

This was my beloved attic - R. I . P

-.-

Of course, there have been other brilliant and eventful things that happened

in my life this year...I Just dont want to document them here and now. I'll bore you person-who-is-kind-enough-to-read-this. But twas a great year full of LOTS of crazy ups and downs.
Right now, December 2012... at the start of this month, I have met a new person who has just walked into my life, and Im hoping they are here to stay. ♥
It could change my life.

Please dont leave me G<3
It would mean so much if you liked me back as much as I like you. For once, first time ever, somebody could like me back. It would be perfect. To start the new year with someone new and special.

 Please 2013...be kind to me.